Hayden Christensen (or, An Incredibly Mortifying Quote from My Diary)

A few days ago, I was reading through an old diary and found these exact words, written June 5th, 2002:

“Today we went to see Star Wars: Episode II, Attack of the Clones. It was cool! Awesome! Amazing! Incredible! The guy who played Anakin was an incredible actor!”

My only consolation is that when I wrote this, I was 13. This is reason number 8,647 I’m glad I’m not a teenager anymore.

Someday, I want to get a haircut here.

Where to Go: Elephant Rocks State Park, Missouri

Eons ago (1500 million years, if Wikipedia is to be trusted)— there stood a giant dome of hardened magma, laid bare to the wind and weather. The wind blew, the weather wore, and many eons later, there remained only a round granite tor, covered with gargantuan boulders looking like pebbles a giant had dropped. In the 1800s, a granite quarry appeared on the site, and miners left their graffiti in the rock. Today, that hillside is a Elephant Rocks State Park, one of the most impressive and best-loved parks in Missouri.

My husband, brother and I visited Elephant Rocks a few weeks ago, and spent a couple hours hiking the trails, climbing the boulders, and eating a picnic. We wandered up the handicap-accessible, braille-guided trail to the edge of the barren stretch of stone, then hopped over deep ridges, scrambled between round boulders, scaled steep inclines of granite, and kept on yelling, “Take my picture! Take my picture!” You could easily spend a full day exploring this park, even though it’s small. 

Why you should go: This area is a great outdoorsy destination, and is great for an easy stroll or some fun amateur rock-climbing. The view from the top of the tor is incredible, and with autumn colors just around the corner, I’m hoping to go back for another visit soon.

How to get there: You’ll have to wind through some “Missoura” back roads to get there, but it’s worth it. You can find driving directions on the park’s site.

What to bring: Wear hiking clothes, and shoes with good grips if you plan on doing any climbing. There are picnic tables and grills, so it’s a great place to bring a picnic supper. And don’t forget your camera!

What else you need to know: The park closes around dark, so be sure to get there before evening. If you have some spare time in the area, check out Johnson’s Shut-Ins or Buford Mountain Conservation Area. This trio would make a great weekend trip!

If you have hot guys to accompany you on your hike, that's even better.

Simply Magic

Two days ago, after getting up late and taking way too long to make a healthy lunch (why do celery and onions take so long to soften? Honestly!), I asked Zachary what he wanted to do on his day off. I had just gotten my paycheck, and we were ready to blow some dough.

“Let’s go to Pere Marquette,” he said.

And so we blew some dough on gas, packed a lunch, loaded up a backpack, and hit the road. We listened to Jonathan Coulton on the way up, leaving the city behind and winding along the highway beside the Muddy Mississip’, which sparkled blue under the clear October sky. At Pere Marquette, we hiked up the blue trail, watched the sun on the confluence at McAdam’s Peak, and hiked to the other side of the bluff, finally settling down to eat at Flag Pole Lookout. After we finished our summer sausage sandwiches, Zachary pulled out his copy of The Fellowship of the Ring. We sat on a stone wall with the sweeping wooded countryside beside us, and he read to me. As the air grew chillier, I donned my jacket.

We were so caught up in the story that by the time we realized we should hike back, the sun had already slipped below the horizon. We hiked the couple miles back to our car in the dark, looking at the black tree silhouettes against the rainbow-glow of sunset on the western horizon.

On the way home, we ate caramel sundaes at McDonald’s and listened to Bach’s cello suites, and once we got home, Zach continued reading Lord of the Rings to me until midnight passed and his throat was sore. We made it to the end of Book One. 

Some days are simply magic.

10 Photos of Mirrors and Reflections

I have a fascination with mirrors and reflections— I love the strange perspectives they give to reality. As a kid, one of my favorite road trip activities was staring at the rearview mirror while watching the reflections in the windows in my peripheral vision. If I did it too long, I got dizzy, but I would stare as long as I could. Now that I’m grown up, I still do that. And sometimes I take pictures, too. Sometimes multiple pictures of the same reflection. Don’t judge me. Mirrors are cool.

Self-portrait in Wyoming.

Tucson, Arizona.

Antelope Island, Utah.

Library, Seattle, Washington. It's a whole building made out of mirrors!

A tiny town whose name I cannot remember, Germany.

Same mirror from a different angle.

St. Elisabeth's Church, Nuremberg, Germany.

Building on the side of the highway, St. Peters, Missouri.

More Wyoming.

De Young Museum elevator, San Francisco, California. Also, this is the greatest picture I have ever taken.

Travel Tip Tuesdays: Lessons on Hospitality, Courtesy of My Mom

Like being a good guest, being a good host can take on myriad different forms. I have less experience hosting than I do being a guest, but I love being hospitable. I learned my hospitality skills from the best: not only my excellent couchsurfing and volunteer hosts, but from one of my greatest role models— my mom. Pragmatic, thrifty, and no-nonsense, my mom isn’t the stereotypical hostess who pours attention on guests. But she makes anyone who enters her house feel welcomed and at home. And that’s the point of hosting, isn’t it? Here are some miscellaneous techniques for no-frills hosting of overnight guests. 

Clean up the house enough to be welcoming… A dirty or disastrously-messy house can be a bit off-putting to guests. Do a quick pick-up, vacuum a floor or two, and spray some Febreze around. Be sure that all the seats are free of clutter. Throw the extra junk into a closet somewhere. Light a candle or burn incense.

I couldn't for the life of me find a good photo for this blog… so instead,
here's a picture of Mom's cockatiel, Fiddler, in a tissue box.
(That's Mom in the background, shielding her eyes from the flash.)

…but don’t freak out if it’s not very clean. It happens to all of us: we walk into our friend’s apartment and she says, “Sorry for the mess!” And we just stare awkwardly at the couple piles of clutter and feel guilty about our own much messier room back home. You are more likely to make people uncomfortable if your living room is spotless than you are if there are a few heaps of miscellaneous papers on the end table.

Provide a supply of delicious food… Food is a universal language, and almost everyone loves it. I am constantly amazed at how impressed people are by something as relatively simple as homemade cookies. Anything remotely homemade looking— even if it’s a baguette you bought at Walmart served with olive oil and a sprinkling of parmesan— is sure to make people feel honored and welcomed.

…but don’t feel pressured to make something fancy or extravagant. If all you have in the fridge is a two-dollar frozen pizza (and you can’t afford to buy anything else until payday), then have no qualms about throwing it in the oven. Food is important, and it’s great to provide a personal touch, but good hosting is about you, not your food.

Don’t ask for help… This rule only applies to “guest” guests. With family members or close friends, always ask for help!

…but readily accept help if it’s offered. Many people (like me) would rather help out than sit around. Give your guest a clear and easy task and use the time as a chance to talk.

Engage your guests… When it comes down to interacting with people, no amount of advice can prepare you— you just need to practice. If you are relaxed, your guests will relax. If sitting and talking is making you antsy, find an activity everyone enjoys. And of course, be prepared to be a tour guide!

…but go to bed when you’re tired. Don’t force yourself to stay up late for guests— if you’re tired, stand up, announce that the house is theirs, ask them if there’s anything else they need, tell them to grab something from the pantry if they get hungry (and give specific examples of snack options to make sure they know you mean it), and then go to bed. It’s amazing how liberating for guests this simple act can be. It says, “I trust you with this house, and I don’t have to entertain you— as long as you’re here, you’re a member of the family.”

As I said, there are many different kinds of hosting. But “Raid the fridge, I’m going to bed now” hosting is still, by far, my favorite. 

~~~

15 Items on My Travel Bucket List

Since my life of nomadism has officially come to a close, my travel bucket list has gotten considerably shorter. However, that doesn’t mean it’s gone away— and Zachary has added several experiences to the list. Here are 15 travel-related things I still definitely want to do (with Zachary, unless noted otherwise) before I kick the bucket!

1. Visit all 50 states. (29 down, 21 to go!)

2. Take a trip to Louisiana to visit the Tabasco farms.

Hopefully, this will be Zach and me next year!

3. Camp out on the salt flats of Utah again.

4. Host a Thanksgiving dinner for some travelers from another country.

5. Hike a section of the Ozark Trail. 

6. Visit Vancouver, Canada, with my sister.

7. Explore Wyoming’s national parks.

8. Finally visit Maine. (I’ve wanted to since I was a little kid!)

9. Take a road trip around New England in the autumn.

10. Go stargazing in a desert.

11. Take a day hike across Rhode Island.

12. Camp at the bottom of the Grand Canyon.

13. Go camping in Alaska.

14. Take a road trip through the Dakotas, Montana, and Idaho to Oregon.

15. Hike the Pacific Crest Trail in 2014!

~~~

Purple Starfish, Fairhaven, Washington

Non-Feel-Good and Not-So-Nice Words of Jesus

(This is your warning that I’m discussing the forbidden topic of religion. I’m even going to quote Bible verses. If you’re cool with that, keep reading. If religion offends you, you should probably keep reading anyway. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.)

After reading my very rushed blog yesterday, my husband pointed out that it was both vague and somewhat accusatory. I knew it was vague— to be honest, I dashed it off quickly because I had other work to get done— but I didn’t mean for it to be accusatory. So, since I have more time today, I wanted to expound a bit on my statement. 

I spent a few hours the other day reading through sections of three of the Gospels: Matthew, Luke, and John. As I read, I marveled that, if asked to describe Jesus, most people, Christian or not, would probably say that he was a good teacher who taught us to love each other, be nice, and do good things. This is because some of his most famous teachings follow these lines (all quotes are from the NIV translation):

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” (Luke 6:31)

“Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.” (Luke 6:36)

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble of heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

As a Christian, I believe everything that the Bible says is true. Therefore, when Jesus says that he is gentle and humble, I believe him. Most people would agree. But if you read his teachings long enough, you begin to notice that his overarching themes are much darker than happiness, niceness, love and peace. They are severe. They demand a giving up of life, not just a change of behavior. They are anything but feel-good.

Here are just a sampling of his teachings— and while many of them make more sense in context, most are just as difficult in context as they are out.

“Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. I have come to turn ‘a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law— a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’ Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.” (Matthew 10:34-38)

“But woe to you who are rich, for you have already received your comfort. Woe to you who are well fed now, for you will go hungry. Woe to you who laugh now, for you will mourn and weep. Woe to you when all men speak well of you, for that is how their fathers treated the false prophets.” (Luke 6:24-26)

“But he who disowns me before men will be disowned before the angels of God. And everyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven, but anyone who blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven.” (Luke 12:9-10)

“I came to bring fire on the earth, and how I wish it were already kindled! But I have a baptism to undergo, and how distressed I am until it is completed! Do you think I came to bring peace on earth? No, I tell you, but division.” (Luke 12:49-51)

“If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters— yes, even his own life— he cannot be my disciple.” (Luke 14:26)

When Jesus interacts with people, he is often compassionate, and/or, more commonly, cryptic. Other times, though, his dialogue is dripping with sarcasm:

At that time some Pharisees came to Jesus and said to him, “Leave this place and go somewhere else. Herod wants to kill you.”

He replied, “Go tell that fox, ‘I will drive out demons and heal people today and tomorrow, and on the third day I will reach my goal.’ In any case, I must keep going today and tomorrow and the next day— for surely no prophet can die outside Jerusalem!” (Luke 13:31-33)

Sometimes, as when he healed ten lepers and only one came back to thank him, he sounds arrogant:

Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Was no one found to return and give praise to God except this foreigner?” (Luke 17:17)

Other times, he just chews people out:

He said to the crowd: “When you see a cloud rising in the west, immediately you say, ‘It’s going to rain,’ and it does. And when the south wind blows, you say, ‘It’s going to be hot,’ and it is. Hypocrites! You know how to interpret the appearance of the earth and the sky. How is it that you don’t know how to interpret this present time?” (Luke 12:54-56)

And he has no problem being impolitely blunt:

Jesus said to them, “If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and now am here. I have not come on my own; but he sent me. Why is my language not clear to you? Because you are unable to hear what I say. You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desire.” (John 8:42-44)

In short, Jesus said a lot of nice things that can be written in fancy font on bookmarks to give us warm fuzzies— but the majority of his teaching isn’t like this, and many things he says are controversial or difficult enough to make anyone squirm. Cherry-picking the things we like and ignoring the things we don’t is an act of either disbelief or idolatry. It gives us an incomplete picture of who Jesus was, and what he was trying to tell us.

Jesus’ teachings do not exist to make his followers happy— they exist to make us more like God. That is not an easy or popular path. But it’s the only path he offers. Or, in his own words:

“If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it.” (Matthew 16:24-25)

~~~

Random Thought of the Day

Many people think that Jesus was a “nice person” who taught “feel-good” philosophy. These people have clearly not read the Bible. 

Travel Tip Tuesdays: How to Be a Good Guest

If you’re a budget traveler like me, you’re going to end up spending a lot of your trip as a guest in somebody else’s home. When I traveled, I usually got positive feedback from people who have hosted me, so, despite feeling a bit arrogant for covering this post, here goes. Being a guest, like many things in life, requires balance.

Observe, observe, observe… Your goal from the moment you see or meet your host is to figure out what will make them feel most comfortable. Some people love to bustle around making you elaborate food while you sit on the couch. Others like to tell you to raid the fridge after you help them fold their laundry. All styles of hospitality are great in their own ways, and picking up on this early on will help you be a good guest.

…but be yourself. Don’t put on a facade or try to force yourself into something unnatural. Everyone reacts differently to different kinds of situations, so just adjust your own attitude without trying to change your personality. 

Chores are fun when you do them together!  (They are even more
fun when you're allowed to eat the undersized blueberries.)

Be eager to help out… Many people love it when you pitch in and help. I’ve had people rave about what an amazing guest I was, just because I washed the dishes! Asking if anything needs to be done— and then insisting that yes, you will really do it if they want you to— is never amiss.

…but don’t force your host to let you help. Some people would honestly rather do the work themselves, without any help. If this happens, don’t keep insisting that you need to help. Just let them do their work, and be available to talk or entertain yourself, depending on the situation.

Engage with your host… Especially if the host is someone you’re meeting for the first time, be sure to show interest in them. Ask questions, share about your own experiences, and then ask more questions. Try to get them talking about themselves (which most people will readily do).

…but don’t make them feel like they have to “entertain” you. Some hosts get stressed out if they feel like they need to sit and talk to you all the time. Try to make it clear that you’re perfectly happy to entertain yourself. (For instance, you can share your sightseeing plans, or mention that you brought plenty of books to read.)

Don’t complain… Nobody likes an entitled guest. If someone is putting you up in their home, you should be grateful, even if the air conditioning is broken, their cat is a terror, and the food is mediocre. 

I made American pancakes for my hosts in France.
Thomas put mustard on his. We were all baffled.

…but if something is really bothering you, bring it up politely. If there is something that honestly makes you uncomfortable (unexpected invasion of privacy, for instance), or something that can be easily fixed (you need more blankets), don’t be shy about bringing it up. Most people would much rather you said something than be uncomfortable. And of course, if things are awful beyond belief, bid your host a polite goodbye and go stay in a hotel.

Offer gestures of gratitude… Who doesn’t love a good “thank you?” While you’re staying with the person, show them that you’re grateful. Use your judgement to figure out what kind of “thank you” your host would most appreciate. Cook them a meal, help them with something you’re good at, fold them an origami crane, do the dishes, play them music, leave a sweet note when you leave. 

…but don’t try to “pay them back.” Opening a home is a truly wonderful gift, and it isn’t something that you can pay back. Don’t undermine your host’s gift by trying to “make it up to them.” Just accept it, and then both of you can enjoy your host’s generosity.

Above all, be chill. Focus on relaxing, take everything in stride, deal calmly with bad circumstances, enjoy the good times, and seek to create a calming presence. If you’re relaxed, your host can relax too— and that, as a guest, is your ultimate goal.

~~~

Have a travel question? Leave a comment and I’ll answer!