"Yes, Dear."

At my wedding shower last year, my friend Emily B. gave me this card:

While I laughed loudly, most of the other women in the room were less enthusiastic, with reactions from confusion to barely-concealed disapproval. One of them joked that the variation of “Yes, dear” was what Zachary was supposed to say to me, not the other way around. This was not a new reaction: Zach had already had to endure that suggestion a dozen times from different jokesters (some slightly more serious than others).

I found it interesting that everyone, without social consequence, could imply that Zach should submit to me, but it was taboo to suggest that I should submit to him. And yet, since we are both Christians and both believe that the Bible should be taken seriously, that is exactly what I’m supposed to do.

My allegiance is, first and foremost, to God, so if Zach’s orders and God’s orders collided, I would need to stay true to my first love. However, Zach has never made me make that choice. We have our less-than-shining moments (me especially), but all in all, he makes it easy to submit to him because he’s very easygoing, sensitive, and considerate. In short, he loves me. And that fact makes it a whole lot easier for me to say “Yes, dear” when he makes a decision. I get loved and he gets respected. It’s like God designed this to be a good marriage model or something. Weird, huh?

In the end, the “yes, dear” joke is just a joke. But it’s important that we let the joke apply to both spouses, instead of regulating it to husbands. After all, I think it’s pretty funny.

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