A Few Travel Quotes

I like writing down quotes— although I have a couple pages from famous people, and 19 pages of Tolkien quotes, many of my quotes are things my friends have said. I have an entire document of funny travel quotes. I shall now share the non-R-rated ones. (People in the real world swear. A lot. Sometimes it’s funny. But that’s not blog-appropriate material.)

(From my trip to Washington with World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms):

“I was talking about aliens. I know Lisa was talking about God, though.” ~Bernadette 

“Man, this is cool… and we aren’t even on ecstasy!” ~Erin

“I am capable of using complete sentences without swearing. I just have to think really hard.” ~Bernadette

(From my trip to Florida:)

Me (to my German friend Matthias): Well, I’m glad you’re not a Nazi.

Matthias: Ah, yes. Not for several months. My hair has grown back.

Matthias (to my Israeli friend Raz): Now we must fight! …Oh wait, we should not. That would be too cliché.

My WWOOFing girl friends!

(From 11-year-old Aaron, while I was tutoring him in Utah:)

Me: "It's always nice to have a ‘best friend’ character in a story."

Aaron: "Yeah, 'cause then you can kill them off."

(From my trip to Oregon:)

Zach’s four-year-old brother Calvin, pointing out a Holstein in a picture book: “That was you, back when you were a cow.”

Calvin (holding up a stuffed dog): This is Bob Dylan!

Me: He doesn’t look very much like Bob Dylan.

Calvin (pauses, sniffs the dog): But he smells like him.

(On the drive home, after suffering several hours on Highway 1:)

Me: Bet you didn’t get highway hypnosis on Highway 1.

Zach: No, it was more like highway getting-beat-with-a-stick.

(From the Insomniac Folklore tour:)

Everyone in the band, at various times: “We’re not in Kansas. We’re not on a bus in Kansas. And we don’t have ulcers. Today is a great day!” 

~~~

Ramblin' Road Trip, Day Four: Long and Winding Road

When I saw the sign that read, “Narrow Winding Road, Next 22 Miles,” I wondered if our decision to take Highway 1 down the coast was a bad one. We had agreed upon it, since we thought it would be scenic and since Zach was willing to drive it. Imagine, seeing the white-foaming waves crash upon the picturesque California coast! View in your mind the stunning panorama of wild sunlight upon the glistening ocean! The surf, the sand, the solitude! What could be better?

“I’m carsick,” Zach said as the topsy-turvy road nearly sent us spinning off into the sea. “Do we have any more water?”

I shook the near-empty bottle. “No.” There was nowhere to fill up, just miles upon miles of road snaking through the admittedly pretty scenery along the coast— well, it would have been prettier except for the mist that had settled over the ocean. The entire landscape to our right was a blank sheet of gray. 

I put on a fake grin. “Having fun yet?”

“I would give anything to be on Interstate 5 right now.”

I sank further into my seat and began munching on chocolate-covered pretzels. We were both thinking about the turn-off we had passed about ten minutes ago, a turn-off that promised to lead us back to the comfort of Highway 101.

“But it’s scenic,” I mumbled.

Zach didn’t reply audibly as we swooped around another sharp curve.

“Do you want to turn around?” I asked.

He paused for several long seconds, looking distant and seasick. “Yes.”

We pulled a U-turn and suffered through another 57 miles of rolling hills that twisted and turned with rollercoaster enthusiasm. At last, 128 spilled us out on Highway 101. Zach returned to cruise control. We listened to Simon and Garfunkel. The scenery on 101 was pretty boring, but neither of us minded at all.

~~~