Monday, June 11, 2012

Fearless?


“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear.” *

*That’s from the Bible (1 John 4:18, for those of you who wish to look it up). 
I’ve been thinking a lot about fear lately. If there’s anything most people seem to think about my travels, “You’re brave to do it” is a common consensus. Some might call me fearless. And in some ways, they might be right.
I’m not afraid to travel to a different place and figure out how to get myself around, how to find food, how to obtain shelter (even if it’s an IHOP overnight), and how to avoid creepers.
I’m not afraid to be by myself, wander around without someone there to help guide me, make friends anywhere, and to be self-sufficient.
I’m not afraid to travel.
However, I’m deathly afraid of screwing up. 
When I’m traveling, the stakes almost always center around me, and no one else. Put simply, if I make something go wrong, I’m the only one who suffers. But if you’re taking care of more than just yourself, the stakes get higher. The closer you get to people, the easier it is to make mistakes and hurt them. I have a deep fear that I’m going to ruin everything. 
You can’t accomplish anything when you’re too scared to move. So it’s my goal this week to love instead of fearing, to move instead of freezing, and to be bold even if I don’t feel like it. 
For me, that takes more guts than traveling anywhere in the world.
~~~

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